Tuesday, August 17, 2010

ZWR 2010 MLB Draft Update (Signing Deadline)

How awesome of a life did Huey, Dewey and Louie have?

Some high school kid that I never heard of didn't sign but we only took him in the 27th round because everyone knew he wouldn't sign but we took a shot because those picks are really only for people who stink or are awesome but committed to Clemson or Stanford and likely won't sign anyway.

The Red Sox signed their 27th-71st round pick guys for a billionty-two.

A kid with a dirty hat that has a perfectly-rounded brim and committed to LSU will still go to LSU. His doppelganger signed with the Angels at 11:45 for $1.2, which, I hear, is "over slot".

That kid from the Natinals--Kayleb Hardon or whatever his name is--signed for the equivalent of the gross national product of Turks and Caicos (note: drug-running not included in official GNP estimates). The Strasboner and Hardon-led Natinals will rule the National League for the next decade, so we may as well just enjoy this while it lasts, Phillies fans. In fact, Kayleb Hardon might just be the next JD Drew, who is still the next Mickey Mantle.

Mantle. Ruth. Mays. Drew. Hardon.

Oh, and remember that our first round pick signed like five minutes after the draft because his family's already loaded and used to run the zoo and he wants to chase after white women with Domonic Brown. Don't forget him:

But seriously, if you want a slightly less analytical, more terse read on the draft, check out this donkey.

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