So Roy Halladay Pitched Yesterday (5.10.11 v. Marlins)

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What the sad? Let this be a life lesson, kids: sometimes you do the best you can... and the situation just proves itself to be outside your realm of total control. Like the time in sixth grade when I requested Goodnight Saigon at the Spring Fling Dance (it was right there at the top of the page, too, I remember it clear as day), and the DJ was all “LOL I’m gonna play It Takes Two for the ninth time dogg but nice Z-Cavs I like that roll at the ankle". I slept soundly that night, knowing I brought my A game. Wait what.

But yeah, Roy was awesome last night. He was arguably better than Josh Johnson (who the Marlins play-by-play donkey referred to- exclusively- as “JJ” no fewer than eleventy thousand times (no for real they must be BROSEPHS or at least once “JJ” bought him a beer at the airport or something)), only Doc’s team didn’t win the baseball game and he took the L. Alas. It made me frown. Here, look:

The line: 8 IP, 5 H, 1 ER, 2 BB, 9 K (5 cuttered, 4 so cuttered).

Fargle bargle. Seriously- look at that line. Ohwells, we said we’d all go down together.