|Oh hellllll nawww|
ZWR enthusiast Amy sent along a fascinating link last night concerning our hero Roy Halladay. The story's about a little fishing trip that HLHIII went on earlier this month with buddies Chris Carpenter (who I assume threw his line so well that neither the fish nor water were able to make any sort of solid contact with his gear), laughably rich lefty B.J. Ryan, and professional angler Skeet Reese.
Only this trip was to the Amazon. Yeah, that Amazon.
Like, in the wild Amazon with seven-legged alligators and giant killer fish and SyFy movie plots just waiting to happen everywhere.
And then this happened:
Me and Doc Halladay even came across a local, sitting bare naked on a tree by the river. What we were able to figure out is that he was fishing in the river for tropical fish to sell for aquariums when he got attacked by an anaconda.
The snake apparently bit him on the [butt] but he was able to free himself before the snake wrapped him up. Instead the snake wrapped around his motor on the back of his little 14 foot dugout canoe and tore it off the back of his boat. Doc and I helped him gather his gear and flip the boat back over and then towed him home.
I'd just like to pause for a moment and reflect on this totally true, not-made-up-by-ZWR story.
Roy Halladay, Phillies ace, tireless humanitarian, workout warrior and bolg muse is BATTLING GIANT DEADLY ANACONDAS IN THE AMAZON DURING THE OFFSEASON. I can now never quit this bolg. You know that, right? Also, local natives are now left to ponder the circumstance that led to a puzzling face-less anaconda in their waters.
And yes, B.J. Ryan totally would have blown the save.