Thursday, July 11, 2013

ZWR NBA Insider Jacob's Free Agency Preview

ZWR NBA Insider Jacob can be found (and followed) on Twitter here. Past articles here, here, and here.

Free agency is usually one of the most exciting parts of the NBA offseason. This year has been no different. Part of this is because of all the big moves being made, and part of it is because Chris Broussard just keeps making sh*t up to keep us guessing. Thanks, Chris! Keep up the good work!

For starters, we have the big names that are staying home. David West resigned with the Indiana Pacers for 6 years and $121 million. I cannot confirm those are the actual numbers, but that seems like a good contract. Oh and of course there is Chris Paul who will be staying with the Clippers in LA. CP3 is being joined out there now by Doc Rivers. In case you don’t remember, Doc once won a championship with a starting point guard that did not make a single shot all season (real stat, look it up, Rondo can’t shoot for poop). What that means is him now having Chris Paul on his side makes the rest of the league pretty screwed.

The real news in any period of free agency, however, isn’t who stays. Who goes is the news that gets everyone excited, and my-oh-my have there been some HUGE moves.

Chris Copeland to the Pacers? Sorry, Heat. Your reign is over.

Devin Harris is a Maverick now? You know what that means: Devin Harris is apparently still alive.

Mike Dunleavy joins the Bulls? Always hated Dunleavy.

Al Jefferson a member of the Bobcats? That actually seems like a good move but it probably isn’t because Michael Jordan sucks at his job.

Josh Smith to the Pistons? Don’t leave him open from deep or you will get scored on 28.3% of the time. If Josh Smith’s career shooting percentage from beyond the arc were his batting average, you would still be well within your rights when bitching about him.

Paul Millsap to the Hawks seems like a pretty good move since Smith is leaving. Smith is probably a better athlete, but Millsap has always come across as way less of a dipsh*t.

Marco Belinelli to the Spurs does well to make the Spurs even more freaking obnoxious.

Finally, my sources indicate that Andrew Bynum will probably attempt to sign with a bowl full of jelly beans.

Oh and Dwight Howard can suck it forever.

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