Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Special Eagles Report Card w/ the OGs Craney, Danger, and Evan

Running Backs
ZWR: You have to make this trade. Linebacker is a position of greater need that’s tougher to fill, this is a deep running back draft, and (like it or not) the salary cap plays a huge role in these decisions. All of that said, I love Shady. 

Grade: A+++++++++++++++++++++++++ forever and thank you for so many amazing memories.


CK: Who cares it’s gonna snow a mountain again. Do you guys like roast beef? If so condiment preferences for both hot and cold style.

ZWR: Of course I like roast beef. I assume you mean sandwiches? On cold, I prefer horseradish and sometimes mustard. On hot I want mild provolone, hot peppers, and gravy. 

The Evster: I'm typing this while using voice text and driving in my car. But yo, in the past two years the Eagles have gotten rid of my absolute favorite players of all time: Mikey Mikey Vic Vick, DeSean Jackalack and now Shady. I don't care about winning a stupid Super Bowl. I don't care about linebackers who aren't named Byron Evans. I just want a team of true gangsters who can run faster than other people and bang bitches after the game. I'm out. The Hudsucker Proxy Part II droppin April 23rd. Y'all ain't ready. 

ZWR: So, ummmmmm, is that an A+++++ Forever? 

CK: RB Hot - Horseradish, cherry peps, provy and jus. RB cold straight spicy mustard homey oh and cheddar. You ever see that jawn in Chicago where they put the entire beef sandwich inside a pot of just before plating it. I want to eat that. F the Bears tho. Speaking of the Bears how about a sneaky signing of Peanut Tillman do it Chip.

Kelly’s in Wildwood has bomber roast beef yo.

ZWR: Yeah bruh we went to Chicago a few years back and I got one of those Italian Beef jawns they dipped the whole banger in the gravy it was good. I got one at another place that was the same thing, but they also jammed an italian sausage in there. Also a banger.

CK: PS - Kiko Alonso is a beast. BYE SHADY. I want CJ Spiller on this team. #bangerz

DG: He's going to be so cold in Buffalo : (


1 comment:

  1. Think about it this way: Chris Polk scores TDs on approximately 60% of his touches, so even when the Eagles sign whichever of AD or AP Adrian Peterson prefers to call himself these days, if we can get Polk a hundo touches, that is 60 rushing TDs, which is pretty good. #Analytics #SportsScience #hashtags

    I expect to see another one of these about corners when Chip signs Byron "Leftwich" Maxwell from the Seahawks, then immediately trades him to the Pats for Darrel "No Man is an Island 'cept ME" Revis.


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