Hey there kids, it’s once again that time of year when we’re reminded just how much- and why- we love the game of baseball. The visceral reactions to seeing bright green grass and sunshine, to remembering that we get a reason to drink on weeknights free of guilt, and just the game itself are undeniably cheerful. With players taking to the practice fields in Clearwooder, and Vegas setting the Phils over/under in the 60s, there is a palpable excitement in the air!
No, I’m serious. This team is moving in the right direction! There are brilliant young talents arriving or on the way, payroll flexibility (wait what), and a new approach that will benefit the Fightins going forward.
|(AP Photo/Chris O'Meara)|
“HOLY CRAP ZWR THAT SOUNDS AWESOME I SURE AM GLAD TO BE A PHILLIES FAN!”
Thank you, imaginary reader, I agree! However, I’m sure the question that’s really on your mind—all of our minds, really-—is this:
“WAIT A SECOND ZWR DOES THIS MEAN YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE SOME AWESOME NEW T-SHIRTS?!”
Yeah girl you know it.
“AJGFKASLKJFDNFDEWRNMFRELD! zOMG I AM EXCITED.”
As well you should be. I’m actually introducing three new shirts. One for future MVP and the most bangin prospect in baseball, JP Crawford. Another for future MVP and current big league stud Maikel Franco. Last but not least, we have our 2016 issue in the annual “Clearwooder” Spring Training Series™.
“WOW, thanks ZWR! Could you maybe just include some pics below?
You’re welcome. Sure- my pleasure!
“I assume these are available at your renowned, fashion-forward web boutique?!”
Follow the link, donkey.